Quote of the Day

(the Gang is watching a security tape)

Cordelia: Look! Right there, zoom in on that. 

Xander: It’s a videotape. 

Cordelia: So? They do it on television all the time. 

Xander: Not with a regular VCR they don’t. 

Wesley: Perhaps we could stay on the topic for once. What were you doing this afternoon? 

Cordelia: What? Um, I was… 

Xander: Burning a hole in daddy’s wallet, as usual. I just bumped into her during my tuxedo hunt. 

Oz: What’s that? Pause it. 

Xander: Guys! It’s just a normal VCR. It doesn’t… Oh wait, uh, it can do pause.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 20 — “The Prom”

Quote of the Day

Buffy: I want to share this with you. It’s like all these doors are opening to all these little worlds, and I can just walk right inside. 

Oz’s thoughts: No one else exists either. Buffy is all of us. We think. Therefore, she is.

Willow’s thoughts: She knows so much. She knows what Oz is thinking. I never know that. Before long, she’ll know him better than I do.

Buffy: No, don’t think that.

Willow: I can’t help it Buffy. I’m sorry, I just can’t. (leaves)

Oz: If you don’t need me, I’m gonna follow the redhead. (leaves)

Buffy: Guess I won’t be writing that book, ‘Gaining Friends through Telepathy.’ 

Cordelia: (in her head) Whatever. I wonder when I can go. (out loud) Whatever. Can I go?

Wesley: (sticks his head out of the office) Excuse me. Can you hear me thinking in here? I could go out into the hall. 

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 18 — “Earshot”

Quote of the Day

Willow: I’m a blood-sucking fiend! Look at my outfit! 

Alfonse: A human. I should have smelled it right away. 

Willow: A human? Oh, yeah? Could a human do this? (She screams at the top of her lungs)

Anya: Sure. Yeah. Humans do that. Yeah. 

Alfonse: Yeah. Yeah, I think, yeah.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 16 — “Dopplegangland”

Quote of the Day

Xander: Willow, what are these? 

Willow: They’re early admission packets.

Xander: Harvard… Yale… Wesleyan… Some German Polytechnical Institute whose name I, uh… I can’t pronounce. Is anyone else intimidated? ‘Cause I’m just expecting thin slips of paper with the words ‘No Way’ written in crayon.

Oz: They’re typing those now.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — “Bad Girls”

Quote of the Day

Xander: But… It’s just that it’s buggin’ me, this ‘cool’ thing. I mean, what is it? How do you get it? Who doesn’t have it? And who decides who doesn’t have it? What is the essence of cool? 

Oz: Not sure. 

Xander: I mean, you yourself, Oz, are considered more or less cool. Why is that? 

Oz: Am I?

Xander: Is it about the talking? You know, the way you tend to express yourself in short, noncommittal phrases? 

Oz: Could be. 

Xander: I know! You’re in a band! That’s like a business-class ticket to cool with complementary mojo after takeoff! I gotta learn an instrument. Is it hard to play guitar? 

Oz: Not the way I play it. 

Xander: Okay, but on the other hand: eighth grade. I’m taking the flügelhorn and gettin’ zero trim. So the whole instrument thing could be a mislead. But you need a thing, one thing nobody else has. What do I have?

Oz: An exciting new obsession. Which I feel makes you very special.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 13 — “The Zeppo”

Quote of the Day


Oz: (about Willow’s SAT score) Well, I can see why you’d be upset. (Willow looks hurt) That was my sarcastic voice.

Xander: You know, it sounds a lot like your regular voice.

Oz: I’ve been told that.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer – Season 3: Episode 8 – “Lover’s Walk”

Quote of the Day


Willow: I mean, this time, it’s not your boyfriend who’s the cold-blooded… (Oz walks in) Jelly doughnut?

(later in the episode)

Giles: Our task now is to determine what sort of killer we *are* dealing with. Clearly, we’re looking for a depraved, sadistic animal.

Oz: (entering) Present. (Willow rushes over to him) Hey, I may be a cold-blooded jelly doughnut, but my timing is impeccable.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer – Season 3: Episode 4 – “Beauty and the Beasts”

Quote of the Day


Giles: Right. It’s good to see you. Um, no need to panic.

Oz: Just a thought: poker: not your game.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer – Season 3: Episode 4 – “Beauty and the Beasts”

Quote of the Day


Oz: How do, Debbie?

Debbie: Hi, Oz. Hey, you’re not doing jazz band this year?

Oz: Oh, can’t take the pressure. It’s not the music that’s hard, it’s the marching.

Buffy: We have a marching jazz band?

Oz: Yeah, but, you know, since the best jazz is improvisational, we’d be going off in all directions, banging into floats… Scary.

Willow: He’s just being Oz.

Oz: Pretty much full-time.

Buffy the Vanpire Slayer – Season 3: Episode 4 – “Beauty and the Beasts”

Quote of the Day


Willow: Okay. Now, he’s had his two o’clock feeding, and, uh, after sunrise, if he forgets where his clothes are, they’re on top of the file cabinet in his cage. I put those towels up for privacy. 

Xander: Uh, no worries. I can handle the Oz Full Monty. I mean, not ‘handle’ handle, like ‘hands to flesh’ handle. 

Willow: Mm, okay. Well, it’s not for you. It’s for me, ’cause I’m still getting used to half a Monty.

Xander: Oh. Good…. Half? You and Oz? Which half? 

Willow: Wouldn’t *you* like to know?

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 4 — “Beauty and the Beasts”