Tag Archives: Malcolm Reynolds

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Wash: Something smells good.

Zoe: Havin’ yourself a little supper, captain?

Mal: Well, Saffron insisted on… you know, I didn’t want to make her feel… it’s damn tasty!

Wash: Is there any more where that came from?

Saffron: I didn’t think to make enough for your friends. But everything’s laid out if you’d like to cook for your husband.

Wash: (laughs uncomfortably) Isn’t she quaint? I’m just not hungry.

Zoe: So, are you enjoying your own nubile little slave girl?

Mal: She wanted to make me dinner. At least she’s not cryin’.

Wash: I might! Did she really make fresh bao? (Zoe shoots him a look) Quaint!

Zoe: Remember that sex we were planning to have, ever again?

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Mal: She’s a nice girl.

Book: Seems very anxious to please you.

Mal: Well, that’s their way, I guess.

Book: I suppose so… If you take sexual advantage of her, you’re going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.

Mal: What — I am not… preacher, you got a smutty mind!

Book: Perhaps I spoke out of turn.

Mal: You may perhaps I’m thinking!

Book: I apologize. I’ll make her up a room in the passenger dorm.

Mal: Good.

(Book leaves, then pops his head back in a moment later.)

Book: The special hell.

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Saffron: Are you gonna kill me?

Mal: What?! What kind of crappy planet is that? Kill you?

Saffron: In the maiden’s home I heard talk of men who weren’t pleased with their brides —

Mal: Well I ain’t them! And don’t you ever stand for that sort of thing. Someone ever tries to kill you, you try to kill ’em right back! Look, wife or no, you are no one’s property to be tossed aside. You got the right same as anyone to live and try to kill people. I mean, you know… people that are… That’s a dumb planet.

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Mal: I’m sorry. You have very nice qualities, but I didn’t ever marry you.

Book: I believe you did. Last night.

Mal: (goes over to Jayne) How drunk was I last night?

Jayne: Well I dunno. I passed out.

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Mal: She’s no one!

(Saffron bursts into tears)

Kaylee: Captain!

Mal: (to Saffron) Would you stop that?

Saffron: I’m sorry.

Mal: You brute.

Kaylee: Hey, sweetie. Don’t feel bad. He makes everybody cry. He’s like a monster.

Mal: I’m not a monster!

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Mal: Zoe, would you get Wash?

Zoe: (on the intercom) This is Zoe. We need all personnel in the cargo bay.

Mal: Whoa, whoa. I said Wash.

Zoe: Captain, everyone should have a chance to congratulate you on your day of bliss.

Mal: There’s-there’s no bliss! I don’t know this girl!

Jayne: Then can I know her?

Zoe: Jayne! Don’t sully this.

Mal: You are gonna be cleaning latrines with your face you don’t knock that off.

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Mal: Zoe, why do I have a wife?

Jayne: You got a wife? All I got is that dumbass stick sounds like it’s raining. How come you got a wife?

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Mal: Gaaahhh! Who the hell are you?

Saffron: What do you mean?

Mal: Well, I think I was pretty clear. What are you doing on my boat?

Saffron: But… you know I’m to cleave to you…?

Mal: To-whubba-who?

Saffron: Did Elder Gommen not tell you?

Mal: Tell me what? Who are you?

Saffron: Mr. Reynolds, sir… I’m your wife.

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Inara: So, explain to me again why Zoe wasn’t in the dress?

Mal: Tactics, woman. Needed her in the back. ‘Sides, those soft cotton dresses feel kinda nice. It’s the whole… air-flow.

Inara: And you’d know that because…?

Mal: You can’t open the book of my life and jump in the middle. Like woman, I’m a mystery.

Inara: Let’s keep it that way. I withdraw the question.

Firefly —Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”

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Bandit: Pardon me for intruding, but I believe y’all carrying something of mine.

Jayne: T’ain’t your’n!

Bandit: Did you think we wouldn’t find out you changed your route? You gonna give us what due us, and every damn thing else on that boat. And I think maybe you’re gonna give me a little one-on-one time with the missus.

Jayne: Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature.

Mal: How can you say that? How can you shame me in front of new people?

Jayne: If I could make you purtier, I would.

Mal: You are not the man I met a year ago.

(Mal and Jayne draw their guns)

Mal: Now think real hard. You been bird-dogging this township a while now. They wouldn’t mind a corpse of you. Now you can luxuriate in a nice jail cell, but if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty flowered bonnet, I will end you.

Firefly — Episode 6 — “Our Mrs. Reynolds”