Simon: What are you doing?
Mal: I’m fixing to do some business. Can’t be herding these steers and your sister, too.
Simon: She didn’t mean any harm.
Mal: I never figured she did. But when a man engages in clandestine dealings, he has his preference for things being smooth. She makes things not be smooth.
Simon: Right. I’m very sorry if she tipped off anyone about your cunningly concealed herd of cows.
Firefly — Episode 5 — “Safe”
Mal: So, she’s added cussing and hurling about of things to her repertoire. She really is a prodigy.
Simon: It’s just a bad day.
Mal: No, a bad day is when someone’s yellin’ spooks the cattle. Understand? You ever see cattle stampede when they got no place to run? It’s kind of like a… a meat grinder. And it’ll lose us half the herd.
Simon: She hasn’t gone anywhere near the cattle.
Mal: No, but in case you hadn’t noticed, her voice kinda carries. We’re two miles above ground and they can probably hear her down there. Soon as we unload, she can holler until our ears bleed. Although I would take it as a kindness if she didn’t.
River: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems.
Mal: See, morbid and creepifying, I got no problem with, long as she does it quiet-like.
Firefly — Episode 5 — “Safe”
Jayne: We was just about to spring into action, Captain. Complicated escape and rescue op.
Wash: I was going to watch. It was very exciting.
Firefly — Episode 4 — “Shindig”
Badger: Who’s that then? Here, look at me. What’s your story, love?
Simon: She’s … just a… just a passenger.
Badger: Yeah? Why ain’t she talking? She got a secret?
River: (with Badger’s accent) Sure, I got a secret. More than one. Don’t seem likely I’d tell ’em to you now, do it? Anyone off Dyton Colony knows better than to talk to strangers. You’re talking loud enough for the both of us though, ain’tcha? I’ve known a dozen like you. Skipped off home early, running graft jobs here and there. Spent some time in the lock down, but less than you claim. And you’re what? Petty thief with delusions of standing? Sad, little king of a sad, little hill.
Badger: Nice to see someone from the old homestead.
River: Not really. (to Simon) Call me if anyone interesting shows up. (leaves)
Badger: I like her.
Jayne: That there — exactly the kind of diversion we could have used.
Firefly — Episode 4 — “Shindig”
Book: A duel?
Wash: With swords?
Simon: Captain’s a good fighter, he must know how to handle a sword.
Zoe: I think he knows which end to hold.
Firefly – Episode 4 – “Shindig”
Simon: (sarcastically) Oh yes, he’s a real beast. It’s a wonder you’re still alive.
Jayne: Looked bigger when I couldn’t see him.
Firefly – Episode 3 – “Bushwhacked”
Jayne: Something wrong?
Simon: Hmmm? Oh, no. I suppose it’s just the thought of a little Mylar and glass separating a person from… nothing.
Jayne: It’s impressive what “nothing” can do to a man. Like that fella we bumped into. He’s likely stuck up under our belly about now. That’s what space trash does, you know. Kind of latches onto the first big something that stops long enough. Hey now, that’d be a bit like you and your sister now, wouldn’t it?
Firefly – Episode 3 – “Bushwhacked”
Jayne: You know what the chain of command is? It’s the chain I go get and beat you with until you understand who’s in ruttin’ command here. Now we’re finishing this deal, and then maybe… maybe we’ll come back for those morons who got themselves caught. You can’t change that by getting all… bendy.
Wash: All what?
Jayne: You’ve got the light.. from the console.. keep you… lift you up. They shine like… little angels… (collapses)
Wash: Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?
Simon: I told him to sit down.
Kaylee: You doped him.
Simon: It was supposed to kick in a good deal sooner. I, I just didn’t feel comfortable with him in charge. I hope.. hope that’s all right.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
Simon: Hey.
Kaylee: Oh! Hey, Doctor.
Simon: You really should just call me Simon.
Kaylee: Oh, I’ll do that, then.
Simon: So, what are we doing?
Kaylee: Oh! Crime.
Simon: Crime? Good. Okay, crime.
Kaylee: It’s a train heist. See, we fly over the train car. The Captain and Zoe sneak in, we lower Jayne onto the car, and they bundle up the booty, and we haul ’em all back up. Easy as lyin’.
Simon: They’ve done this before?
Kaylee: (laughs) Hell no. But I think it’s gonna work.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
Mal: Shepherd Book.
Book: Captain! How’s the girl?
Mal: Still a little whimsical in the brainpan. Seems calm enough though.
(River throws stuff in the background)
Book:That young man’s very brave.
Mal: Yeah. He’s my hero.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
The Love Pirate 