Tag Archives: Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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Anya: For a thousand years I wielded the powers of The Wish. I brought ruin to the heads of unfaithful men. I brought forth destruction and chaos for the pleasure of the lower beings. I was feared and worshipped across the mortal globe. And now I’m stuck at Sunnydale High. Mortal. Child… And I’m flunking math. 

D’Hoffryn: This is no concern of ours. You will live out your mortal life and die. 

Anya: Give me another chance. You can fold the fabric of time. Send me back to that place and I’ll change it. I won’t fail again. 

D’Hoffryn: Your time is passed. 

Anya: Do you have any idea how boring twelfth graders are?

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 16 — “Dopplegangland”

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Buffy: When did you guys hang out?

Xander: Oh, she was fighting one of those, uh, apocalypse demon things, and I helped her. Gave her a ride home.

Buffy: And you guys talked?

Xander: Not extensively. No.

Buffy: Then why would you… Oh.

Giles: Oh!

Willow: I don’t need to say ‘oh’. I got it before. They slept together.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 15 — “Consequences”

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Giles: If you want to criticize my methods, fine. But you can keep your snide remarks to yourself. And while you’re at it, don’t criticize my methods.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — Bad Girls

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Wesley: You’re not helping. 

Giles: No. I feel just sick about it.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — “Bad Girls”

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Wesley: Ah. This is perhaps Faith?

Faith: New Watcher?

Buffy and Giles: New Watcher.

Faith: Screw that. (walks out)

Buffy: Now, why didn’t I just say that?

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — “Bad Girls”

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Wesley: Buffy, you will go to the Gleaves family crypt tonight and fetch the amulet.

Buffy: I will?

Wesley: Are you not used to being given orders?

Buffy: Whenever Giles sends me on a mission, he always says ‘please’. And afterwards I get a cookie. 

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — “Bad Girls”

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Buffy: New Watcher? 

Giles: New Watcher.

Wesley: Wesley Wyndam-Pryce. It’s very nice to meet you.

Buffy: Is he evil? 

Wesley: Evil? 

Buffy: The last one was evil. 

Wesley: Oh, yes. Gwendolyn Post. We all heard. No. Mr. Giles has checked my credentials rather thoroughly and phoned the Council, but I’m glad to see you’re on the ball as well. A good Slayer is a cautious Slayer.

Buffy: Is he evil? 

Giles: Not in the strictest sense. 

Wesley: Well, I’m glad that’s cleared up.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — “Bad Girls”

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Xander: Willow, what are these? 

Willow: They’re early admission packets.

Xander: Harvard… Yale… Wesleyan… Some German Polytechnical Institute whose name I, uh… I can’t pronounce. Is anyone else intimidated? ‘Cause I’m just expecting thin slips of paper with the words ‘No Way’ written in crayon.

Oz: They’re typing those now.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 14 — “Bad Girls”

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Faith: She got me really wound up. A fight like that and… no kill… I’m about ready to pop.

Xander: Really? Pop?! 

Faith: You up for it?

Xander: Oh, I’m up. I’m suddenly very up. It’s just, um… I’ve never been up with people before.

Faith: Just relax… And take your pants off.

Xander: Those two concepts are antithetical.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 13 — “The Zeppo”

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Giles: All we know is that the fate of the entire world rests on it. (looks into the doughnut box) Did you eat all the jellies?

Buffy: Did you want a jelly? 

Giles: I always have a jelly. I’m always the one that says ‘let’s have a jelly in the mix.’ 

Willow: We’re sorry… Buffy had three. 

Buffy the Vampire Slayer — Season 3: Episode 13 — “The Zeppo”