Mal: Well what about you, Shepherd? How come you’re flying about with us brigands? I mean, shouldn’t you be off bringing religiosity to the fuzzy-wuzzies or some such?
Book: Oh, I’ve got heathens aplenty right here.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
Mal: Shepherd Book.
Book: Captain! How’s the girl?
Mal: Still a little whimsical in the brainpan. Seems calm enough though.
(River throws stuff in the background)
Book:That young man’s very brave.
Mal: Yeah. He’s my hero.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
Simon: We’re on a ship.
River: Mid-bulk Transport. Standard radion accelerator core. Class code 03-K64–Firefly.
Mal: Well, that’s somethin’. I can’t even remember all that.
Simon: Need a weave on that?
Mal: It’s nothin’.
Simon: I expect there’s someone’s face feels differently.
Mal: Well, they tell ya, never hit a man with a closed fist, but it is on occasion hilarious.
Simon: I suppose so. So the, ah, the fight…didn’t umm, draw any, umm, any attention.
Mal: No Feds. Just an honest brawl between folks. Ain’t none of us wanted the Alliance on us, Doctor, that’s why you’re here.
Simon: I thought I was here because you needed a medic.
Mal: Well, not today.
(Mal leaves)
River: Mal… bad… in the Latin.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
Mal: My thanks Wash, nice save as always.
Wash: A pleasure.
Mal: And how are our passengers?
Kaylee: They’re fine. So, what happened? Was there a terrible brawl?
Zoe: Oddly enough, there was.
Wash: Are you gettin’ my wife into trouble?
Mal: Wha? I didn’t start it! Just wanted a quiet drink.
Zoe: Funny, sir, how you always seem to find yourself in an Alliance-friendly bar come U-day, looking for a “quiet drink.”
Mal: See, this is another sign of your tragic space dementia, all paranoid and crotchety. Breaks the heart.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
Lund: Hey, you gonna drink t’the Alliance wi’ me? Six years today, the Alliance sent the browncoats running, pissing their pants. Y’know, your coat is kinda a brownish color.
Mal: It was on sale.
Lund: You didn’t toast? Y’know, I’m thinkin’ you one of them independents
Mal: And I’m thinkin’ you weren’t burdened with an overabundance of schooling. So why don’t we just ignore each other, til we go away?
Lund: The Independents were a bunch of cowardly inbred pisspots. Shoulda been killed off of every world spinnin’.
Mal: Say that to my face.
Lund: I said, you’re a coward, and a pisspot. Now what are you gonna do about it?
Mal: Nothin’. I just wanted you to face me so she could get behind ya.
(Zoe decks him)
Mal: Drunks are so cute.
Firefly – Episode 2 – “The Train Job”
The Love Pirate 