Quote of the Day

Mrs. Kim: You break, you buy!

Man: But it was sticking out in the aisle.

Mrs. Kim: You break, you buy!

Man: But I didn’t put it in the aisle.

Mrs. Kim: You have eyes, yes?

Man: Yes I have eyes.

Mrs. Kim: These eyes work?

Man: Yes these eyes work.

Mrs. Kim: They can make out shape, sizes, and colors?

Man: Yes they can do all that, but—

Mrs. Kim: Eyes work! They see lamp in aisle, send message to brain. ‘Lamp in aisle — move’ You move. You don’t break lamp.

Man: I —

Mrs. Kim: You have no eyes, not my problem, that is between you and them. You break, you buy. 

(He gives her some money.)

Mrs. Kim: (smiling) We appreciate your business.

Gilmore Girls — Season 1: Episode 12 — “Double Date”

Quote of the Day

Luke: Here.

Rory: What’s that?

Luke: You look like you need pie.

Rory: I do?

Luke: Violent pencil tossing usually signals the need for pie.

Rory:What if I’d thrown a pen?

Luke: I would’ve brought you a trout.

Rory: What?

Luke: I don’t make the rules, I just carry them out.

[Lorelai comes in]

Lorelai: Hey, backwards baseball hat – new look for you. She’s eating pie? Did she even have dinner?

Luke: You raised her, I just serve.

Gilmore Girls — Season 2: Episode 4 — “The Deer-Hunters”

Quote of the Day

Michel: Excuse me. There’s a phone call for you, and if I’m to fetch you like a dog, I’d like a cookie and a raise.

Gilmore Girls — Season 1: Episode 2 — “The Lorelais’ First Day at Chilton”

Quote of the Day

Lorelai: Michel, the phone.

Michel: Mmhmm. It rings.

Lorelai: Can you answer it?

Michel: No. People are particularly stupid today. I can’t talk to any more of them.

Gilmore Girls — Season 1: Episode 1 — “Pilot”

Quote of the Day

Lorelai: Please, Luke. Please, please, please.

Luke: How many cups have you had this morning?

Lorelai: None.

Luke: Plus…

Lorelai: Five, but yours is better.

Luke: You have a problem.

Lorelai: Yes, I do.

(Luke fills her cup)

Luke: Junkie.

Lorelai: Angel. You’ve got wings, baby.

Gilmore Girls — Season 1: Episode 1 — “Pilot”