Inara: So. Would you like to lecture me on the wickedness of my ways?
Book: I brought you some supper, but if you’d prefer a lecture, I’ve a few very catchy ones prepped. Sin and hellfire… one has lepers.
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Mal: You send word to Patience?
Wash: Ain’t heard back yet. Didn’t she shoot you one time?
Mal: Everybody’s makin’ a fuss.
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Zoe: Now we have a boat full of citizens right on top of our stolen cargo. That’s a fun mix.
Mal: Ain’t no way in the ‘Verse they could find that compartment, even if they were lookin’ for it.
Zoe: Why not?
Mal: ………… ‘Cause……..
Zoe: Oh, yeah, this is gonna go great.
Mal: If anyone gets nosy just, you know, shoot ’em.
Zoe:Shoot ’em?
Mal: Politely.
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Mal: It’s been a long time since Patience shot me, and that was due to a perfectly legitimate conflict of interest. I got no grudge.
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Zoe: So, do like Badger said, the border planets?
Mal: I’m thinking Whitefall, maybe talk to Patience.
Zoe: Sir, we don’t want to deal with Patience again.
Mal: Why not?
Zoe: She shot you.
Mal: Well, yeah, she did, a bit…
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Jayne: I don’t understand why we didn’t leave that sumbitch in a pool of his own blood.
Mal: We’d be dead. Can’t get paid if you’re dead.
Jayne: Can’t get paid if you crawl away like a bitty little bug neither. I got a share of this job. Ten percent of nothin’ is — lemmie do the math here — nothin’, and then nothin’, carry the nothin’…
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Kaylee: You’re gonna come with us.
Book: Excuse me?
Kaylee: You like ships; you don’t seem to be lookin’ at the destinations. What you care about is ships, and mine’s the nicest.
Book: She don’t look like much.
Kaylee: Oh, she’ll fool ya. You ever sail in a Firefly?
Book: Long before you were crawlin’. Not an aught-three though, didn’t have the extenders, tended to shake.
Kaylee: So, uh, how come you don’t care where you’re going?
Book: ‘Cause how you get there’s the worthier part.
Kaylee: Are you a missionary?
Book: I guess. I’m a Shepherd from the Southdown Abbey. Book, I’m called Book. Been out of the world for a spell, like to walk it a while. Maybe bring the Word to them as need it told.
Kaylee: Well I’m Kaykee, and this here’s Serenity. She’s the smoothest ride from here to Boros for anyone can pay… Can you… pay, or…
Book: Well, I got a little cash, and, uh… (opens box for Kaylee)
Kaylee: Oh, grandpa!
Book: I never married.
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Zoe: He’s the captain, Wash.
Wash: Right, I’m just the husband.
Zoe: Look, I’ll ask him.
Wash: Don’t forget to call him sir, he likes that.
Mal: (walking in) Who likes what?
Zoe: It’s nothing, sir.
Wash: (gives Zoe a thumbs up)
Firefly – Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Zoe: I know somethin’ ain’t right.
Wash: Sweetie, we’re crooks. If everything were right we’d be in jail.
Firefly: Episode 1 – “Serenity”
Mal: All right, let’s get these crates stowed, I don’t want any tourists stumbling over them.
Kaylee: We’re taking on passengers at Persephone?
Mal: That’s the notion. Could use a little respectability on the way to Boros. Not to mention the money.
Jayne: Pain in the ass.
Kaylee: No, it’s shiny! I like to meet new people, they’ve all got stories!
Jayne: Captain, can you stop her from being cheerful, please?
Mal: I don’t believe there’s a power in the ‘Verse can stop Kaylee from being cheerful. Sometimes you just wanna duct tape her mouth and dump her in the hold for a month.
Kaylee: I love my captain.
Firefly: Episode 1 – “Serenity”
The Love Pirate 